a friend of mine in danger

[david uk]

(please feel free to move this to the zoo if you feel it does not belong here)

as i told Dee in our private chat earlier today I was thinking of not posting this thread as I was afraid of the reaction it would get, however I feel it is important.

please bear in mind this is happening not in Iraq or Iran, but in a Muslim country actively supported by the US and UK governments and many multinational companies.I have a very good long term internet friend in Abu Dhabi (United Arab Emirates).. we talk every day just like I do with Dee over in Canada... sounds all very nice.

He is gay.. very hard to have any kind of life over there whatsoever, so guys (don't know about the girls) just meet over the internet and then at one or the other's homes... everything is conducted in the utmost secrecy and often they don't even exchange names as they are afraid of anyone finding out. It's all about sex as anything more is impossible.

My friend had a rendezvous with a guy he met last week and they went back to this guy's place... one thing lead to another and when he got home he discovered money had gone from his wallet. He now lives in a state of fear, thinking this guy will try to blackmail him and report him to the authorities- even word of mouth of being gay is enough to get you arrested there. Tnis guy only took money but will have seen his ID documents.

My friend is terrified.... not only that the other guy will try to blackmail him (apparently the police would take his accuser's word) but also as he still lives with his parents in his 20s he will have to account for the missing money.

He has told me his only recourse is to pray.

Please tell me why the UK and US were so keen to depose Saddham Hussein but are so keen to support other, equally undemocratic regimes with brutal systems and no regard for our precious human rights...

sorry but I am worried tonight and needed to post.

[Dee]

I was horrified when you first told me David, and I still am. I cannot fathom living as a Gay person under such conditions. I pray the guy will be more terrified of being jailed too, than trying to blackmail your good friend.

I also pray your friend will find the strength to hold up under all this duress!

[david uk]

thanks

don't know how well I'll sleep tonight- he's a highly educated guy and such a lovely person... it could be you or I

[Dee]

Yes it could have been David, given birthplace and culture. Really gives a person reason to be grateful for the liberties we have!

[DaveM]

I just hope all works out well....this is far from the first horror story I have heard out of the U.A.E. And as you say, this is a nation that is supposed to be our ally (of course, so is Saudi Arabia....sigh). It makes no sense to me.

Some years ago (pre-Internet) I had a lengthy correspondence with a couple who moved to Dubai after a job offer (she was German, he was Syrian). At some point, the employer took both of their passports, claimed that they owed him money, and essentially held them for ransom. I never did find out what happened....there were a few letters and then one of mine was returned "Address Unknown".

With friends like these....

[hoops]

it sure puts things in perspective... i will be praying

[Agnes]

:eek:

That's so awful I can't even find words to express the horror... I'll keep your friend in my thoughts, David...

[david uk]

I hope to have a chat with him today - he is online at the moment but I am unable to buzz him....

I'll post an update when I have one....

david x

[ponytail]

I'm praying for him too. How awful to have to live in fear like that.

[david uk]

chatted to him and he said he is trying to puch it to the back of his mind, knowing there is nothing he can do...

he did though say he found out by chance that an Irish friend of his out there has met this gut and that he is notorious for this kind of thing.

all I can say to him is to be very careful- but what can you do if you live in such a culture where the only contact you can have with other gay people is surrupticious sex, and even then you run the risk of blackmail and imprisonment...

anyway I am a bit more relaxed tonight.....

[snakegrl]

Seems his best bet is to get the hell out of Dodge if he has no allies,resourses, or a way to defend himself. He's outnumbered. If he stays he also puts his parents at risk.
Most likely, the thieves will be back to milk the cow. It's their job.
I think he needs to do more than pray.
If he can't fight them, which appears to be the case, then he should leave.
That's just my 2 cents

[david uk]

yes snakegrl but he CAN'T leave.....that's the point. He was born in Egypt and raised in the United Arab Emirates.

he cannot get a visa to emigrate anywhere... even tho he is a well educated doctor, the world hates arabs at the moment and he is stuck where he is.

he is desperate to leave.... the US wouldn't have him, the UK neither...

[snakegrl]

Perhaps Canada then. Or somewhere. Anything can be had if you know the right people. There could be a way out. Someone must need a doctor of fill-in-the-blank nationality somewhere. There are desperate places for desparate people.

[david uk]

sorry if it were that easy he would be out by now...

let's get real:)

[snakegrl]

Well then, don't know what else to say except to not give up. He will have to play along until he contacts people to help him. I hope your friend finds them soon.