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gisli
01-05-2008, 07:49 PM
LONELY

What is the defenition of being lonely? What makes one feel lonely? Here is a litle tale of a n old man that lived all his life, well almost all of his life in the same farm out in a countryside. When he was a young man there was around 20-30 farms where he lived, there was a lot of hardship, lot of work but people managed to live and did what had to be done and over the coldest and darkest time of the year they held christmas and after that Thorrablot, where they mocked each other, relentlessly and without shame
.
In time he met his wife, had children and his children grew up and went away to have a home of theyre own and then his wife passed away.
Suddenly he was alone in his farm and not only that, he was the last farmer in his part of the country and the next town was a good half an hour drive away. But he didnīt feel like leaving so he kept on farming and he did so for many years.

When he was 76 years old he decided to heed the request of his children and moved to the big city of Reykjavík, where all his children and grandchildren lived. He sold his farm and bought a little apartment in a 20 apartment building, he went from a place where there was him alone to a place where there were100.000 thousand habitands

Well six months later a friend of his from the old countryside decided to visit him and see how he was doing.
After a cup of coffee and talk about the weather, a common conversation starter and a icebreaker, the friend hinted that this must be a much better change to the better for him to have moved. Now he had tv and all other quality of life and all with in the walking distance from home.
Yes, the old man replied, there is some truth in that.
And here are you, said the friend visitor. You live in a building with a lot of people and your family not far away from you, that must be a whole lot better then in the country where you lived all alone and had noone near you to visit?
Yes, replied the old man again. That is true.....but it is also true that I have never been as lonely in my life as now.

The guest had difficulties understanding the last remark and asked if that wasnīt a bit to dramatic point of view.
So it may be but I donīt think so, said the old farmer. Here I seldomly meet anyone and if by chance I see someone in the hallway and greet him, I hardly get any response. My children work so much that they donīt have the time to visit me so much as they did when I lived in my farm, at least they came over in theyre summer holidays. And in my farm you came at least once a week with my post and milk and stayed over for a cup of coffee and chat. Here surrounded with all this people.....I have never felt lonelier in my life.



For me I am more lonely when in the big citys then in my home in the countryside. We have time in the country to find what we seek for........But when in the city I find myself fall in the pit to search and not find...there are to much distractions of somekind in those surroundings.

I am like the old man, I tolerate myself better in isolation and feel less lonely...........strange.

hoops
01-05-2008, 08:31 PM
well, i'm with you there gisli
peace
hoops

Elliott
01-05-2008, 09:24 PM
I believe there is a big difference between being alone, and being lonely. I enjoy my alone time; but for me there is nothing better than being alone together with the one I love.

DaveM
01-05-2008, 11:26 PM
"I never found the companion that was so companionable as solitude" --Henry David Thoreau.

diver_boy
01-08-2008, 03:51 PM
good one
thx for sharing :)

Agnes
01-08-2008, 10:28 PM
I hear you, Gísli. I love solitude and the peace and quiet of the countryside. And I find myself more in tune with myself and others in those surroundings. Yet I live in the city, for practical reasons. When I can spare some time, I go for a walk in the forest and enjoy not being surrounded by people, but by an occasional fox or squirrel and the silence of the trees.

I find that I get better in creating an oasis in the hurry of the city and my home reflects that. There may be a lot of noise, but Home is warm and peaceful. It's easy to relax there and connect, city or not. I agree with Elliott; I love being alone, but it's being alone together that I love most.

Dee
01-09-2008, 04:40 AM
Loneliness is a huge problem in the world today, even tho we (most of us) are connected more than ever. That seems to be reflected in the explosive popularity of the Internet and cell phones. However, it's important for me to have alone time too. My cell phone for example is only on when I am making or expecting a specific call. Otherwise it stays off. I love my boyfriend dearly but we both make time for ourselves apart, and I think that's important too.