Finding a friend

[gisli]

Like David uk I guess we all have stories to tell about friends who "where" but for some strange reason drifted away or we drifted away from them.

I have a lot of friends like that from every era of my life.

Well a few years ago I started to wonder.....where are they now?....and I started to search them down, one by one. Some where easy to find as others where.......not so easy to find. Two of my best friends from the old days are living abroad, one in Sweden and one in Utah, USA. We have as of now not met but have sent pictures through the internet of one another and our familys and communicate with one another that way also.

Those living here in Iceland....it was funny to meet again, cause it was as if we just saw one another yesterday....it was like there had never been any "time" in between, though years had passed, we still where friends and there where no barriers between us. Needless to say we all had been monitering one another from a distance.

Two weeks ago I finally made a move to contact the last of my friends from the past and that I did with the help of Janis Ian. Yes there where barriers to tear down and I had no way of knowing how to do it....until Zoetermeer.

This friend of mine was my best, dearest and closest friend for two years....from the time I was 17 years old.....yes this is another At Seventeen stories.

(Sorry guy´s, but my wife is calling me for dinner.......I´ll be back in five with the final part of the story)

[david uk]

lol Gisli! you can't just leave us like that, mid-story!:p

[gisli]

As a seventeen year old boy I was shy, not sure of myself, thought I was the uglyest duckling in the world, in short I was killing myself of selfpity and cheating myself in solitare.

Then she came into my life, let´s call her Jane. She worked in a icecream-shop that I often visited and from the first moment I set my eyes on her I knew I wanted to know her better, every time I saw her I got a butterfly-feeling in my stomach. It was not love (or maybe it was) but I am a one woman man and I was in love at that time...........the love of my life at that time was Julie Andrews????? I mean I had seen Sound Of Music 16 times at that point so it had to be true love.

Anyways at one point I couldn´t take it anymore and dared myself to ask Jane out, or at least drive her home after work. To my amazement she said without hesitation, "Yes I would love to go out with you".

What followed was like the two greatest years of my life up until then, she never stopped to amaze me, always made me feel good, tought me much about life, introduced me to new and different friends, friends that where struggeling to come, or had come out of the closet. In short, not only did she better me but because of her prejudice became a bad word and she was the one.....Jane was the one who introduced Janis Ian to me.

She had been in America and there, she said, Janis was a big star. And we talked a lot about Janis Ian music and life in general.....in between going to partys and visiting mutual friends.

I have always thought of her as one of my soulmates in life and when we departed I missed her a lot and still miss her. It was my doing that made us part and I am afraid that I did it in a rather harse way, something I will always regret. And the worst thing is I never told her how much I cared for her.

For ages I have thought how to brake the ice and contact her again and always came up emtyhanded.......until it dawned on me in Zoetermeer when Janis sang At Seventeen.....

After the show I went over to Janis to thank her for the consert and asked her if she could sign one of her FITNB to Jane. I asked Janis for a paper so I could write Janes name. Janis looked at me with her beautyful eyes and said, "Oh no...is this going to be one of those difficult norse-names?" and smiled.

Well, when I got home I posted the disk to Jane (yes I know I am a coward) and with the disk I wrote a short letter, stating why I sent her the cd and wrote my mobilenumber and name under.

Days past without me hearing from her so after well over a week I thought she just wanted to leave it at that and I thought, well at least I tryed............

Then the phone rang and it was her.......and we talked and talked and talked....it was just so fantastic to hear her again. As it happens she is still with her partner from way back and is doing well in life. She still listens to her "old" Janis albums and was very thrilled to know that Janis was still making music. But what she liked most is owing a signed Janis Ian cd with her name on it...........

........we have arranged to meet next time I go to Reykjavik over a cup of coffee.

Well that is it, that is the story I liked to share with you. It was Janis music that brought us together......again.....it was Janis music that we shared when we where young and restless. And there is no such thing as "old" friends, there just are friends.

Thank you for listening, this was something I had to get out of my chest. Thank you.

[david uk]

Gisli that's such a very touching story, thank you so much for sharing it tonight...

and great that the story had such a happy ending... well it's not the end is it :)

[Dee]

And there is no such thing as "old" friends, there just are friends.

Thank you for listening, this was something I had to get out of my chest. Thank you.

Well thank YOU Gisli for sharing that here.

Being seventeen was a time in my life when I learned "the truth" that life was nothing like the idealised versions in movies and on television. If I felt that way before (which I did) there could no longer be any doubt.

In fact, not only did I feel like a square peg in a round hole, I now knew that I was. In my searching for meaning I made the attempt to have a love relationship with a woman. Imagine if you can, trying to force yourself to make love to anyone. It was awkward and horrible and confirmed what I'd known all along: that I was Gay for sure.

Coincidentally I just had a chat with a message board friend – PeteCC – who I used to chat with quite often. Just happened to catch him online at the same time I was. I felt our friendship was as good as ever, and it brought to mind how few “straight” friends I know who give me absolutely no feeling that they are trying hard to simply tolerate our differences.

Hopefully now that he’s resurfacing, we’ll get the chance to chat more often.

So thanks again for posting your story about Jane!

[Randy & Betty in Pa]

I will address this to Gisli though obviously it can apply to many.... Your story of lost friendship found again is wonderful... All to often we lose friends in the mayhem of life... It's funny how a single clue or idea remains for so many years... I guess we've all shed both happy and sad tears about friends and you know it's wonderful to have a place to share those feelings..... Thank you Janis...

Best to all

R. from pa

[pulmike]

Thanks for this post Gisli. It makes me re-learn how similar life can be for us all, regardless of where we are. We have all of us loved and lost and moved on, and yearned to reconnect. What is so special about your tale is that although it did not bring back the days of your youth, you are happy with what you found. I envy you that.

pulmike

[aabram]

Yes, I can relate to this too. I'm always bumping into friends from a former "life" some of these going way back to before I got married. I get kinda sad when friends move away because sometimes think they won't keep in touch, Half the time I'm right. The other half of the time is spent getting in touch with them again :)

[Eva]

Gisli, how nice that you found eachother again.

Eva

[gisli]

Tanks all for your comments, they are hearthwarming and great to read.

Yes I am in content with my life today but I have wandered what triggered this sudden constant craving to get in touch with my past.

As of now this "nostalgia attack" is in my life, I don´t know why???? Maybe it is a part of the transaction when I realize that life is rather geting shorter in one end with every year that passess.

There may be another reason quite different, I don´t know, but this is how I feel today for better or worse.

[Eva]

when I realize that life is rather geting shorter in one end with every year that passess.
What is this, Gisli? Winterblues? :(

Eva

[Randy & Betty in Pa]

As of now this "nostalgia attack" is in my life, I don´t know why???? Maybe it is a part of the transaction when I realize that life is rather geting shorter in one end with every year that passess.

Hi Gisli....Like you I periodically have "Nostalgia attacks" as well... But you know what... That dosen't have to be a bad thing.... Often when I succumb to such attacks I think about things like my first love, or my best friend from back when I was 7 years old or an old army buddy I haven't seen since 1981 when he came to visit me....

It is true that we are all aging and theres not much we can do to stop that other then die so I guess the best we can hope for is to age in a manner that best keeps us happy, smiling and full of grins and giggles.... Yes those years do seem to be zipping on by but you know what... theres a good side to that as well... Janis will go on tour that much sooner :)

Don't let aging dimminish your love and joy of living... Thats a trade-off thats just not worth it... I see it like this... We will die when we die... and you know, for my part if I died today I would want everyone to know that I lived, had a good and full life, regret somethings but not to many... And I would say I'm happy.... Janis, her music and this board is a small but not insignificant part of the joy I've felt in life...

Stay well my friend or as has been said...

"Live Long and Prosper"

Best to you and yours

R. in no hurry to be beamed up from Pa...:o

[gisli]

What is this, Gisli? Winterblues? :(

Eva

No.

I have it from a very reliable source from the fifth dimension with two tenticles that come out from his head that I am a pessimism by heart and even though I believe in Ragnarok and stars falling onto earth, I do not live by it, even though I have filled the basement, (which is by the way bombproof, just in case) with loads and loads of tin can food..........so this merely must be my .....monophause period:eek:

[gisli]

Hi Gisli....Like you I periodically have "Nostalgia attacks" as well... But you know what... That dosen't have to be a bad thing.... Often when I succumb to such attacks I think about things like my first love, or my best friend from back when I was 7 years old or an old army buddy I haven't seen since 1981 when he came to visit me....

It is true that we are all aging and theres not much we can do to stop that other then die so I guess the best we can hope for is to age in a manner that best keeps us happy, smiling and full of grins and giggles.... Yes those years do seem to be zipping on by but you know what... theres a good side to that as well... Janis will go on tour that much sooner :)

Don't let aging dimminish your love and joy of living... Thats a trade-off thats just not worth it... I see it like this... We will die when we die... and you know, for my part if I died today I would want everyone to know that I lived, had a good and full life, regret somethings but not to many... And I would say I'm happy.... Janis, her music and this board is a small but not insignificant part of the joy I've felt in life...

Stay well my friend or as has been said...

"Live Long and Prosper"

Best to you and yours

R. in no hurry to be beamed up from Pa...:o

Randy, you never seize to amaze me. Firstly let me say that I agree with all of what you say in the above, as in many other posts. Secondly, thank you for being you and a member of this board. It really is an honour to read your post, you really are "The Rock" in this forum world.

[dragonlady]

Gisli,

I can definitely relate to your story...I was talking with Mrs. Redjack about her high school reunion and we were talking about who we'd most like to see from that time...and strangely enough one of those people recently contacted me out of the blue!! Her name is Debbie. and she sent me a email and then we talked on the phone for hours just like we used to do in my room 25 years ago. Just the topics changed. It was wonderful to hear about the other people I wanted to know about too since she's actully been to the school reunions and has been in contact with them. It's a nice re-connection to make.

I'm glad to hear of your re-connection too my Icelandic friend. It's a great feeling!

-di

[gisli]

I'm glad to hear of your re-connection too my Icelandic friend. It's a great feeling!

-di

Thank you and same to you. Yes it is a great feeling, re-connecting. It is also a wonderful feeling to see you post again. You have been away for a long time, to long if you ask me. Glad to "see" you back.:D