New story thread

[marjan]

I was thinking, because most of us are going away from this board in a few days, maybe we can start a new story thread to keep all of you boys and girls busy during our absence :D

It was just around 5 am when Kitty woke up from the strangest dream she ever had!
She remembered just parts of the dream, but she was sure that she went to Mars while asleep. Not nowing how that could be true, she ...

[Randy & Betty in Pa]

turned her thoughts back into the mess within her mind of the dream..... Pittsburgh located not far from the face on Mars... picnics.... Tormented by alien Redjackenesse... Tye-dyed take no prisoner Tee shirts.... Was it really a dream or was it......

[hoops]

the next night the dream was the same, but slightly different. time had passed and things had become new and old had gotten odler or gone away. she shrugged it off this moring, but it was planeted deeply in her memory

[marjan]

Kitty managed to get trough her morning routine, trying not to think to much about that strange dream. On the way to her office at the Crime Lab she stopped at her usual Starbucks to get a black coffee to go ....

[hoops]

trying to not remember , she made herself laugh about the irony of getting a black coffee at starbucks, and it worked. driving to work she found herslef laughing out loud about the whole thing , even to the point os spitting coffee out thru her nose. Even thought her clothes got slightly stained ,she didn't care today she just

[marjan]

tried to keep focused on the job she supposed to do. She parked her car and get into the building she loves to work in. At first she didn't notice that ...

[Eva]

...something was off. After a moment she realised that the same person standing next to her in the elevator, had also been reading a newspaper at Starbucks. And this person also seemed to live near her, because she had seen him this morning too. He had left with the car at the same moment Kitty had. Now, it was very possible that Kitty had a collegue with the same morningroutine as her. Bit it still felt a bit strange. Why had she never met this collegue then before? Was he new maybe? And why was he wearing sunglasses indoors? She decided to ask him:

"Excuse me..."

[DaveM]

"...why are you carrying a penguin under one arm?"

[KarenSews2]

The man pulled down his sunglasses, showing his eyes, and stared intensely at her. One eyebrow raised, giving him a cartoon-like sinister appearance. It was then that she noticed that his eyes were a strange shade of...

[Elliott]

grey.... as if nothing had ever been black or white, or seen too clearly. And gazing back at her, the cool grey eyes seemed to.....

[DaveM]

gazing into the innermost depths of her soul. Jittery from the coffee, but now shaken by the strange sensation in her mind as the expressionless eyes bored deeper, she....

[KarenSews2]

...again asked, "Why on earth are you carrying that penguin?"

A smirk played across his lips before he responded. "Why, I have to take him..."

[Elliott]

I have to take him for food... I mean, of course, to feed him." After licking his dry, cracked lips with an oddly purple tongue, he replied, "Are you suggesting I should carry the penguin somewhere else, other than Earth?" At that moment, the penguin....

[Eva]

said: "Lady, what do you mean why is he carrying a pinguin? Can't you see I am carrying a man? Geesh... you humans always think people are the important ones...!" Then the pinguin spit up a hairball wich the strange man quickly ate. After a loud burp...

[Oak Kitten]

. . . gaze at her with a gaze so gaze-like, that only a gazelle, or a gaspipe, could have emulated its intensity.

[saxman]

seemed to be a musical instrument in the birds wings . every flap produced air or sounds ,songs that helped everyone in the village fly away to a better place to be.

[ponytail]

The other employees thought it strange when the elevator doors opened and only a penguin emerged. Noticing their bewildered expressions, the penguin blurted out, somewhat defensively...

[hoops]

do i have toilet paper stuck on my butt?? the onlookers couldn't help but giggle tho they thought it quite strange to see a penguin coming out of an elevator, that didn't seem to be formost in their minds just now. nor his. his "wings" reached around his body searching out what the group could possiubly be staring at so intensely. he could find nothing so he flipped them

[Elliott]

off and demanded to be told the direction of the Crime Lab. "I'm late" he said. "There is an interesting new case on the books this morning, and I must be the first International PA to view the carbon based life form... I mean the body". The penguin appeared oblivious that the onlookers seemed surprised that his beak had begun to....

[ponytail]

grow longer like the nose of Pinocchio, whose story they could barely recall from their long-ago innocent childhoods. The penguin, however, thought better of speaking further for unrelated reasons of his own and began to waddle down the hall toward...

[KarenSews2]

...a small group of teenaged girls who were all giggling around a life-size poster of...

[Eva]

A giant pinguin... Looking all tough and muscular on the poster.
"Ah... said the pinguin. How nice that you have a poster of me." One girl looked at him, looked back at the poster and then said disappointed while walking away: "And the muscles aren't real either..." "Yes, they are!" stated the pinguin in a hurry. And then hit his ever growing beak in a door. On the door was a sign that said 'Crime Lab'. The penguin opened the door carefully and stepped inside. In the room he saw...

[ponytail]

A nun with a pointer standing next to a blackboard on which columns of names had been written in chalk, with arrows drawn connecting some of the names. At the first sight of her, the penguin cried out joyously, "Mother!"

The nun snapped. "I am not your mother! Though I am a Mother Superior..." She aimed her pointer at the chalkboard.The penguin noticed three detectives sitting in a row of chairs in front of her, poised to take notes. A balding, bearded one raised his hand and asked the nun...

[hoops]

Oy! you want i should know this stuff? do i look like a schmadel? i don't care who you think you are your not my mother,and what a mitzvah that is. not a pretty woman in any way, kind of looks like something you'd find in a live bait shop. but i digress...what's with the new rabbi, rabbi penguin, is that schnoz for real or is it...

[DaveM]

A knish that has gone terribly meshuggah? Something must be done about at once--lemme call my brother the plastic surgeon....he'll do a great job and give you a good price, too. But first....listen to Mama and eat....food is good for you.

C'mon, eat! Mazeltov!

[Eva]

The pinguin hesitated to step in the room. What a bunch of weirdoes. A mother dressed like him. A bald, bearded guy almost forcing him to eat. Is this crime lab or funny farm? He should look further and not stay here. However, the smell of food stopped him from leaving at once. Even the nun sighed and said: "Goddamnit, let's have lunch then." "Mazzel tov!", yelled the baldy, bearded guy.

They all smiled at the penguin. Smiles, food... So inviting. So inviting... The penguin felt a little dizzy. Food... smiles... food... smiles... food... He had no power over his own limbs anymore and let them pull him in as if he was under their spell. Food... smiles...

A small voice in his head warned him that something was very wrong here. He...

[DaveM]

was changing, altering form and mind. He was becoming....what was "a Rudie"?

[hoops]

suddenly he had hair and it spiked straight up off of his head in all the colors of the rainbow! and there he notice a delicious arouma. What was it?!? St.... st..waffel?? i can't quite make out the name but dang it smells good! And some woman called Dar, from another planet called Califorfood or something like that and she kept asking him for some thing called recipes. was he having an out of biody experience or was he...

[Elliott]

...delicious, served with fluffy rice and a crisp, green, salad. "Why I bet I would taste just like chicken!" he thought as drool began to pour over his ever changing beak. Something was wrong here... something had gone terribly wrong. All he could think of were plump, red, beefsteak tomatoes, splashed with EVOO and fresh basil, and the cold pitcher of peach tea that could always be found in his Grandma's ice box. At that moment....

[DaveM]

somewhat shouted "Don't look, BGG!" as the braised penguin was deposited upon a silver tray in the very center of the table. Some thought it looked delicious, others were not so sure, and everyone decided that the apple in its beak was a bit much.

[ponytail]

The End.:(

[hoops]

the end??? not the end this is sci fi, there is no end. i mean the penguin hasn't met the big rabbi in the sky yet and the long beak, is this s joke is this supposed to be funny? and what about the nun with the foul mouth Mother what the blank or whatever her name is, is confession in her future? mr penguin may be braised but he's not broken. and dar?? tell us more about califorfood or whatever planet that is...somebody start the insanity!

[Elliott]

Simon awoke with a start! So strange... it was only a dream. Unlike most others, he was determined that this day was going to be a good one. If only he could remember.......

[hoops]

who that was in the living room on the couch, and why is it naked and how do i know that it is and

[ponytail]

The naked nun sat up on the sofa, batted her eyes at Simon, and said, "Don't recognize me without my habit, eh? MUHAUHAHA!!!!!!!!!!":eek:

[DaveM]

Well, er, habits can be difficult things to deal with....

[hoops]

and old habits are hard to break. all those years pewople have wondered what was underneath tthose things. some thought that there were little people who stood on one anothers shouldersa to create the whole nun, others have beleieved that there was nothing, no body, just some strnge formlessness that floated across the ground. simon, still not aware of how he discovered the truth, now wasn;t quite sure he wanted to know. he went into the bathroom and...

[Eva]

...brushed his teeth. Nun or no nun, fact was that there was a naked woman on his sofa. He should at least have a fresh breath. When his teeth were pearly white, he stepped back in the room and saw then nun was gone. Simon was alone in his apartement again. "Bummer", Simon thought, "It can take years again before any woman steps in here again..." Then he forgot all about it and thought about cleaning his apartement. He turned around and wanted to pick up a dirty old sock when...

[ponytail]

A voice from behind him said, "Simon, I'm in here."

Simon turned and saw the still-naked nun leering at him from inside his bathroom mirror. She chuckled at his surprised expression, then said seductively, "Want to embrace your inner nun, Hon?"

Without a second thought, Simon dived headfirst into the mirror.

[aabram]

"you can keep your hat on" she continued..."just come here...and....." she murmered as Simon crossed the room towards her..... "ooohhhh, baby..."

[Darlene]

But before he reached the naked nun he realized that he had gone straight through the mirror and was on the other side with the nun....He looked around and saw he was in a land of wonder..........

[aabram]

.... the Mad Hatter reached for his cup of tea as Simon approached, and said.....

[Darlene]

Whats jew doin in this jear part of's the hood. An'ts jew got no cents, jew an't jew gots no cents, jew hats to havs a oval circle on jew fourhed befor jew can stays in this hea parts of wonderland. Justs becas jew jumps thr that ther looken class dont means jew can justs goes wher jew wants two. Wenens has somes ruls round hear.....as the Mad Hatter sits silently drinking his tea with an oval on his fore head and some other mysterious markings on his body. Simon goes on to find his place in this mysterious wonderland. The next thing he see is................

[aabram]

....the Knave of Hearts running away with his mother's jam tarts... Simon said "the Mad Hatter's hats are still only 10/6.... I might just get one to wear in bed with the Naked Nun.... Sorry, I have no cents at all. Only £p"

At that the Knave of Hearts .....